Mindful listening is an excellent way to
improve your relationship with anyone! Hi this is Supreet. I upload new videos
every Sunday. You can follow me on Facebook at Crushing Meditation and
Twitter @CrushingMed. In this video I will share with you a simple but very
powerful mindful listening exercise that I learned from the book Search Inside
Yourself. When a friend or loved one is speaking to you, adopt a generous
attitude by giving this person the gift of your full attention and the gift of
airtime. Remind yourself that because this person is so valuable to you, he or
she is entitled to all your attention and all the space and time needed to
express himself or herself. As you listen, give your full attention to the speaker.
If you find your attention wandering away, just very gently bring it back to
the speaker as if he or she is a sacred object of meditation. As much as possible, try to refrain from speaking, asking questions or leading the speaker.
Remember you’re trying to give him or her the valuable gift of air time. You
may acknowledge them by facial expressions or by nodding your head or
by saying “I see”, “I understand”. But try not to over acknowledge so as not to lead
the speaker. If the speaker runs out of things to say, then give them the space
for silence, and then be available to listen when they begin to speak again.
And that’s it! These days I’m trying to do mindful listening with my kids, and I
can see from their faces how much they value me just listening to them – without
pushing them, without judging them or without forcing my own agenda on them.
It’s not easy to do – I will admit – because I’m a busy mom and I get distracted by
the 20 things still left to do on my list for the day, or by the things that
my kids should be doing, instead of talking – like doing their homework or
showering or other things like that. But I’m telling you, do this for 5 or 10
minutes a day and see your relationship transform! I also try to do it with my
husband and my friends and family and I do find, that by deliberately trying to
do this mindful listening exercise, I am becoming a better listener, although I’m
still far far from perfect. I still do interrupt them or become
impatient and want them to cut their long story short. But I’m a work in
progress and that’s okay! As long as I am improving and growing, I’m happy. “Better
today than yesterday” is my motto. Thank you for mindfully listening to me
and giving me the gift of your airtime! I’ll see you in the next video!